April 1864

Date: 2020-06-24 02:53 am (UTC)
willing_sheath: (off my pegs)
I have not spoken since the news came. I cannot bring myself to. Speaking was difficult for me before and not it is impossible. I cannot bring myself to engage in anything. What is the point when none of it matters? Nothing matters anymore...

I remember how Father was after Mother died. I do not remember him speaking for weeks afterward. He couldn't bring himself to even look at Enishi until he was a year old. I can't help but wonder if this is why...

Enishi doesn't understand. He can't understand. He wails and clings to me, demanding my attention, wanting me to be normal again... to be happy... But my happiness died in Kyoto with him.
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willing_sheath: (Default)
Himura Tomoe

I Am Only One


Memories fade into the silence
Haunting me tonight
With hope's last breath I take this moment in
It will be the last
Then morning breaks
And sunlight takes the pain away

Ever after never came
And I'm still waiting
For a life that never was
And all the dreams I lay to rest
Are ghosts that keep me
After all that I've become
I am only one
I am only one

I close my eyes and bleed this empty heart
Of all that longs to die
When faces lie and love will falter
I'm left with only time
And time will break
The dreams that take the pain away

Ever after never came
And I'm still waiting
For a love I'll never have
And all the dreams I lay to rest
Are ghosts that keep me
After all that I've become
I am only one
I am only one

I'm on my own here
And no one's left to be the hero of
This fairy tale gone wrong
As night will fall
My heart will die alone

Ever after never came
And I'm still waiting
For my heart to beat again
And all the dreams I've laid to rest
Are ghosts that keep me
After all that I've become
I am only one
I am only one

I am only one

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